This movie is the show of the year. Every bit of it was a masterpiece. It’s truly a diamond in the rough that shines through and breaks the stereotypes that come with the typical high school comedy with its beautiful cast and its amaz… ok, that’s a lie and it’ll most definitely and certainly not come true magically either. 

Walking into the movie theatre, you sit there, gearing yourself up for a cliché high school feature with the outcast clique of 2 people going through lots of embarrassment and subsequently triumphing over the school’s coolest after a series of lucky events. If you’ve seen Confessions of A Teenage Drama Queen, which was quite dreadfully bimbotic (a female who comes across brainless), you’d think to yourself, how bad can it get?

It can get worse, much worse.

This movie, directed by Christian Charles and written by Jon Lucas and Scott Moore, is really full of it. In every sense of the word, this movie lives up to its name. If you’ve seen the trailer, you’d realise that even that aspect of the filmis full of it. It’s a lie of a trailer that’s actually well done considering at one point or another the movie looked like it had some kind of potential based on the short clip alone. Even the movie’s website and the songs or instrumental pieces played in the cinema before and after the film are more riveting than any part of this incredibly dumb show.

The Non-Plot

Full of It starts off with Mr Super Loser, Sam Leonard, played by Ryan Pinkston, on the first day of his senior year of high school at a new institution, which is already a catastrophic situation that brings to mind a thousand embarrassing moments before the scene even begins. He has parents who are exaggeratedly happy and loving to the point of group hugs after dropping their beloved son at school, and Sam himself has a disastrous haircut with his hair looking like he had a massively thick comb over all the way from one side of his head to the other.

The first 15 minutes of school passes and, already, Sam’s had his first run-in with the school jock after which he meets the very pretty Ms Loser and obviously soon-to-be love interest, Annie Dray. But since he’s already made fun of for possibly everything about himself, he feels that his life is over. He doesn’t want to be the weird math kid and so he goes to see the pain-pill junkie guidance counselor who tells him rather dramatically (must be the drugs) that in order for Sam to be cool, he’s got to lie about himself.

Ridiculously, he follows this counsellor’s advice and lies about everything from his dad being a rock star to owning a Porsche to knowing “Camren” Electra (according to his spelling of her name) to having grossly enlarged private parts. Unfortunately for Sam, the moment the first lie comes out of his mouth (and technically this is where the main non-plot starts), he loses any hope of winning the audience onto his side. What’s equally ludicrous is the fact that everyone believes him. Then one day, he slams his door and breaks his mirror.

Sam wakes up and voila! His dad is a rock star and he does own an admittedly beautiful Porsche, probably the most beautiful thing in the movie, besides Kate Mara who plays Annie, Teri Polo as Mrs Moran and Carmen Electra as herself. Sam’s life goes on well for a while, never missing a shot both literally and metaphorically, and of course he gets the school’s most popular bimbo, alienating his one and only true friend Annie.

One day he feels like his life isn’t going all that well and he has no one to talk to, especially since his mom paints woman’s private parts and his dad is a drunk ex rock star trying to make a comeback, and so he tries to stop lying by telling everyone the truth. At this point, one would probably think, “oh god, this movie is coming to an end”, but really it isn’t. It seems that if one were ever to get into a situation such as Sam’s, the best way to get back to normal is to break another mirror again, after which the movie kicks into a “let’s get out of here” mode that it seems apparent that the makers of this film just wanted the whole thing to end.

For anyone who can appreciate Mara’s beauty, just a word of caution. Don’t stay until the credits. The kiss between Sam and Annie is painful to watch, just because he doesn’t deserve such an attractive girl and because Annie deserves a charming and handsome semi-loser like herself (think Henry in Ugly Betty).

Is there anything right about this movie?

No. Firstly, there was not one point where the jokes were truly funny. For the entire movie, you’ll probably find you’re forcing yourself to laugh because you just can’t believe that the movie is that bad. Almost all of the jokes were crude, unfunny and positively distasteful. Any laughable moment in this movie is attributed to “parts” which is definitely not a plus point.

Secondly, there was no originality in the film, particularly not with the overuse of the car-stop and music-stop scene. Nothing new came out of the movie and we’ve seen everything before.

On top of all that, the plot was messy and not well thought through. It feels like the production team started filming the beginning without really knowing what was going to happen in the end and not knowing how to end it.

Unlovable and “Un-endearing”

Ryan Pinkston is one of the most uncharismatic and unattractive teenage actors there is. Not even one bit of charm oozes out of his body, leaving the audience, quite sadly, very put off. Unfortunately, unlike the actual Shrek, he doesn’t have the cartoon character’s comedic timing or his lovable grumpiness to save his performance.

How one of Maxim’s Hot 100 of 2007 Kate Mara, beautiful Meet the Parents star Teri Polo and sex symbol Carmen Electra got conned into starring in this movie and forced to feign lust for the lead actor is way beyond imagination. All 3 actresses tried their best to help this movie but it just couldn’t be saved from itself.

To watch or not to watch

While Full of It is still showing in cinemas, if you find that you have an extra 10 dollars lying around somewhere and you feel the sudden urge to watch a movie (after you’ve seen everything else), please go to Video Ezy.

Rating: 1 Out of 5 stars

Movie Details

Opens: Nov 29

Running Time: 90 mins

Language: English

Cast: Ryan Pinkston, Teri Polo, Kate Mara

Director: Christian Charles